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You Know You're a Gen X-er When




You learned about a viral video from a story you heard on NPR


You still CALL your girlfriends on the PHONE


You have ‘at least’ one school picture with a scrunchie on your wrist


Grocery stores play all your jams


Your Teen Beat heartthrobs have hair plugs now (and are on the cover of

AARP)


You write notes to your kids in cursive…and they can’t read them


You still possess mix tapes but not one cassette player


You know White Claw is just Zima in better packaging


You are still afraid that you’ll die of dysentery on the Oregon Trail


Dylan or Brandon is still a deep struggle


Your kid asks you where you were for the OJ verdict. Just kidding. They ask

you who OJ is.


Your kids will never know the sheer DREAD of your dad answering the phone

and a boy being on the other end waiting to ask you out


You sing “School House Rock” songs to help your kid study for History tests


If Jordan Catalano busted through your front door you’d leave your

husband, no questions asked


You have unironically told your child to "take a chill pill."


You told your family the brownies for the bake sale were off limits by rapping MC Hammer's

"Can't Touch This."


You wonder if your middle child is a Jan Brady


You own two Depeche Mode t-shirts, but can't remember how you got them


When you see teens wearing Nirvana shirts you angrily ask them if they actually know any

lyrics


You got Paramount Plus so you could watch the Real World Reunion series


You can ID the smell of Aqua Net and Aussie Hair products from a mile away


You call a hashtag ‘the pound button’


You stopped listening to new music in 2001


Life lessons you share with your kids you learned entirely from Full House and Facts of Life


You assert your pop culture relevance by quoting facts learned from VH1’s “Behind the Music”


You are not afraid of much, after all, you drank Crystal Pepsi


You get wildly offended when your kids say “Ok, Boomer.”


At least once a day you see a teen wearing exactly what you wore in college


Your children know all the lyrics to Dead or Alive by Bon Jovi and Shoop

by Salt-n-Peppa


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